Complicated feelings.

Yes, it's my own fault again.

Yes, this is an emo post.

Having miserable, unexplainable feelings right now.

Have anyone of you felt these kind of feelings before?

That your whole world had just crushed in just few seconds?

Yes, I'm experiencing it now.

What should I do? Exams round the corner and I just added myself another stress.

The more I want it to be out of my head, the more I kept thinking bout it.

It's the past I know but, I just can't.

I can't accept the fact.

I know I did mistakes too but, this truth is too hard to be accepted.

I need time.

I need some space for my own.

I can feel insomnia is creeping and crawling to me.

Palpitation, nervousness, sweaty hands, body shivering, shaky hands.

Holding tears in my eyes. Preventing them to drop to the Earth.

I need to release myself.

I'm sorry.

But I just need to go out to release myself for this once.

I just need some time to forget and pass through this.

Once this miserable, complex feelings of mine go away, I'll be myself again definitely.

I won't harm myself but I won't guarantee that.

I've been through I lot these few months.

I believe that I'm strong enough to go through this again. 

It's just too sudden and I can't accept it at this moment.

Humans change. I change. You change. Everyone changes.

I don't know how to forgive myself. 

This is the critical moment, after this, I hope I'll be okay.

I'll try my best. I always try my best in everything. 

I'm sorry.

I'm truly sorry. 

What can I do to forgive myself?

Don't drop, don't give up. Stand up.

Hang in there.